Why I finally started a YouTube channel after years of putting it off

I have forever wanted to start a YouTube channel ever since I signed up in 2011. But I held myself back with all the usual excuses… not enough room, not enough quiet, not enough equipment… They might have been valid enough reasons to start with, but the more I’ve learned about workarounds, it turns out all you really need is motivation and a sprinkle of creativity.

Instead, I focused my creative energy on Instagram and the occasional blog post here and there. (I have been very lapsed of late, but I’m hoping to make myself more accountable!).

Why I’ve Fallen Out of Love with Instagram

My relationship with Instagram has changed. All of a sudden, it seems. I was so immersed in posting and commenting and curating my feed that I hardly came up for air, and I absolutely loved it. But if I’m honest, like a lot of people, I’ve become a bit burned out.

I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve got so much else going on and it’s just one more thing to contend with, but it feels like the pace of it has sped up before my eyes. I feel like I don’t get a chance to savour a project anywhere near enough before it’s time to move on. And I’m finding it stressful.

I’m pretty sure that scrolling was enjoyable in the beginning. But now it seems that every piece of content is a fight for relevance and advertising, of course. Added to that, the trends, both music and presentation, are soooo annoying.

I’ve come to write a blog post this morning because I need a bit of a reset. This is pretty much where I started, after all. This is where the creativity not only involved the project I was talking about, but stories shot from the hip as well. And I miss that.

There’s only so many words you can fit into an Insta caption, and the chances are they might never be read or, if they are, they’ll just glide down the grid within minutes. Right this minute, I am already feeling that cosy cuddle of creativity as I tap away. And in writing, I’ve become aware of just how beneficial it is for my brain.

The moment I start, either on the keys or, if I’m feeling fancy, with fountain pen to paper, I feel an instantaneous wake-up of creative sparkles. Morning pages should really turn into blog pages, but I don’t really want to declare that just yet, as I am master of rebelling against my own rules!

I’m not about to leave Instagram. I have built up a lovely following, and one I truly enjoy connecting with, but I feel an energy shift back to what has always worked for me, along with something new.

That something new is indeed my new little channel on YouTube.

The Real Reason I Started a YouTube Channel

If I’m honest, the main reason for me wanting to broadcast was to get over myself. I’m notoriously anxious when I speak in front of people. I have an essential tremor which is massively triggered by speaking in public. The obvious thing is, of course, to avoid doing things that set off such extreme reactions, but the never-let-it-lie in me won’t allow me to do that. And the older I get, the more determined I am to conquer all that I’m crap at!

It’s a bit of a cheat, of course, because I’m not actually people-facing – I’m shielded by the screen of my front-facing camera. But I imagine that I’m talking to actual people. It took me forever to record the first video because my words would falter. I would forget what I was going to say every step of the way, just like when I’m talking to groups of people I don’t know.

But I’m on video number six now, and it already feels more comfortable, and I’m really enjoying the process.

For context, since joining an art community, I often have to talk to people I don’t know. One of the terms of my rental contract is that I must host studio talks and present my work at open studios, for instance.

I knew it would be hard, and I know it sounds super dramatic, but the prospect of doing things like that makes me feel physically sick, and I start shaking just thinking about it. I am so over my ridiculous reactions that this presented an ideal opportunity to face them and get better at dealing with them.

Learning to Talk on Camera

I feel like things have improved from where I started, but talking on camera and telling my stories is another level of practice. I’m pretty sure that talking about myself layers on another level of anxiety. If I talked about someone else’s life or work, for instance, it would be way easier, I’m sure!

My channel is currently more of the chatty kind. Long-form videos of an indepth tutorial nature might have to be parked for now, but I will be still giving backstory and insights into construction, along with tips and tricks for both art and sewing based subjects, in the meantime.

Much as I love writing, I’ve realised that video is my preferred platform for showcasing behind-the-scenes moments, delivering visual vibes, and allowing space for a much more realistic backstory to a project or point of view compared to a one-minute reel on Insta.

Aside from learning how to relax and present myself, I’ve had to teach myself how to edit – something I forgot to factor in when I first thought to start a channel – and I’ve really embraced building these new skills.

Luckily for me, as a graphic designer, I already have access to the full Adobe Creative Suite, which includes Premiere Pro, the perfect editing software I need to chop out all those ums and ahs and forgetful silent gaps! So, for transparency, don’t be fooled when I flow!

On one hand, it seems crazy to shoehorn something else into my already bonkersly busy week. Turns out shooting a five-to-ten-minute video can actually take up the best part of a day (two for the first video), and I will need at least another one to edit it.

But I’m clearly enjoying it all because no sooner have I posted one than I’m planning another. They will not be coming thick and fast, though, because I want them to be considered. I really do not want to end up down another path of rapid-fire rhetoric.

I started the journey by dipping my big toe in first. I tentatively shared a short, which was a reused reel from my Instagram account. And it went down a treat.

That gave me the confidence to post my first long-form video – a whole 5 minutes and 57 seconds of me talking – and nobody died!

Honestly, it took me so long to create, edit and upload. It was an eye-opener, and I have a renewed respect for all YouTube creators.

I talk about a thrifted dress that I first altered to be more me and then kept adding embroidery, beading and even screen-printed detail. The response was super encouraging. And already I’m feeling like this was a good move.

I already know at this point that this is the place I need to be to not only share the skills that need to be shared, but to revisit projects and give them the airtime they deserve.

I put so much work into the things I sew and paint and draw; I so don’t want them to be destined for a tiny square with a tiny caption. I want close-ups, big-ups and documentation that doesn’t have to tiptoe around an algorithm.

Building a New Creative Community

I am just at the very beginning of building my new community. Interestingly, not many followers came over from Insta. I was at first surprised, since I have a following of nearly 6,000, but then I had to accept that I myself wasn’t really a regular follower of anyone on The Tube until I started posting content myself.

My usage was mostly when I wanted to find out how to do or make something, and I enjoyed being able to tap in and tap out without getting caught in a trap of silly scrolling. But I am slowly finding my tribe there too, and I’m already enjoying some interesting interaction. I’m sure it takes more than a couple of months for the systems to recognise a pattern of interest.

I would love to know how you feel about YouTube. And how you feel about social media in general, really. Clearly, you are here reading my blog, and let me tell you just how much I appreciate you doing that. I know some of you have stuck with me for a very long time despite my sporadic show-ups, and I can’t thank you enough. It makes me feel like I’m pressing “publish” with a purpose!

Do you gravitate towards Instagram, or are you a Facebook fan? Are you an avid watcher of YouTube videos, or do you typically “tap in” like I once did?

And if you’re curious about this new chapter, you’re very welcome to pop over and have a look at what I’ve been up to on YouTube. No pressure, of course. I’m still finding my feet over there, but it would be lovely to know your thoughts and to have you along for the journey.